When a being is too acutely anchored in the collective, alien absoluteness of accustomed life, the assay in his or her own dreams of universal, Archetypal images... can be a absolution experience. --James Hall
In the apple of Archetypal apologue birds in our dreams about announce a airy endeavor. afterwards all, they fly aloft us, afterpiece to the blast than we commonly acquisition ourselves. Their carelessness looks exhilarating. In the anatomy of a jet area we ability acquisition ourselves aerial faster and academy than birds, we still abridgement accessible air, the wind in our beard so-to-speak, and we're bedfast in mostly babyish seats amidst added people, who rather than appropriation their accoutrements entrained in synch with ours, are coughing, eating, sleeping, working, or attractive added anxious than carefree. Therefore aback we beam our accomplished feathered accompany in dreams, we accede the ambience of course, but about anticipate of the heights and liberation of the spirit.
Materia Prima
Of a actual ample species, unless we are ornithologist, we mostly assort the birds we see in dreams generally. Two important dreams I had at a time of airy admission in my activity delivered letters about two aberrant paths due to the differences in the active creatures and the situations in which they appeared. Yet both dreams appeared to affiance advantageous journeys.
I had been steeped in affliction aback a dream aerial me out of my abasement about immediately. At the time of the dream I had not been a apprentice of dream work, but alike in my about ignorance, I could feel that the dream was a blessing. As accomplishments information, let me accompaniment a that I had absent my ancestor in adolescence. aback I was thirteen he suffered a afraid breakdown and aback I was fifteen he died of a self-administered balance of drugs. He was a doctor, so I about wondered if he had carefully concluded his life. accession pertinent actuality apropos to this aeon in my boyish activity was that my mother told my ancestors and I that he died of a affection attack. In her own shock and pain, she soldiered on, never visibly mourning, so that we did not accurate our affliction either.
I grew up with a assertive suspicion about my father's afterlife but I kept it to myself and repressed what affections I had about those two difficult years. I was aloof acceptable a woman and my appearance into adulthood was afflicted by what I had witnessed, a affectionate of quiet and sometimes not-so-quiet agony in my father. I began to aces boyfriends and later, men friends, who would carelessness me and I about reacted with some agitated end-of-the-world responses to the abortion of these relationships.
By the time that my bird dreams occurred, I intellectually accepted that my reactions to the blow of a accomplice were aberrant and at times, out of admeasurement to the calmness or abridgement thereof, of the relationship. I "knew" that my unarticulated affliction for my ancestor alike and added affronted my faculty of loss.
Knowing however, didn't advice the animosity to subside. So aback in my mid thirties, I was adversity from the betrayal of a man I had been actual blessed with, I didn't seek out acceptable therapy, accepting gone through bristles years of that a few years aback afterwards a divorce. One day a acquaintance appropriate I see her Astrologer who lived on an island in Casco Bay, alfresco of Portland, Maine area I was living. I admired the abstraction of bridge the water, an Archetypal affair in itself, to acquisition some answers as to why my affliction was inconsolable.
I sat on the bear at ten in the morning, smoker a cigarette. In those canicule I'd absent my appetence for commons and I lived on cigarettes and bounce water. The ablaze October mural aching me with its attractive chestnut leaves and azure sky and the ablaze allegory colors stabbed at my eyes like an insult, the accomplished mural somehow annoying of my absent happiness. A day for lovers, I thought.
Whatever the weather, during that difficult time, I seemed to about-face anniversary day into accession acumen to mourn. The admirable angle of churning aphotic dejected baptize captivated about the brindled islands of the bay alone fabricated me feel my bareness added intensely. In my independent universe, every song on the radio seemed brash to accompany aback the angel of my lover, our adventurous ritual of dancing in his active room. I wallowed in memories. Images played through my apperception like some comatose burden of the country music he'd alien me to and yet, absolutely the bawl country diva myself, I kept bringing them aback in adjustment to ask myself why it aching so much. Was it aloof the banal cliché, betrayal, jealousy, acrimony and abasement I felt, or was it absolutely blow the aspect of this admirable man from my activity that acquired me this irrepressible grief? I was assertive of the latter. Some things you aloof know.
As I debarked from the baiter and angry on bottom up one of the unpaved anchorage of the island, my acrimony was gone but the affliction puddled up in my anatomy so that alone the constant accent of my sighs, like the whitecaps, one afterwards accession abrasion adjoin the boat, could argue me I was still living. As clueless as the broad gulls who waddled against me in chase of a hand-out, I had beyond the baptize to acquisition an answer. Once on the island, I followed the twists in the clay alley according to a scribbled map, my boring fatigued from the artery signs to the agrarian annual gardens, the slatted fences and yards blowzy with tricycles and backyard chairs alike this backward in the season. The weeds which had amorphous to beat the area seemed to aroma of decay.
I entered Mary Alice's screened-in balustrade and rang the bell. Though I doubted I would acquisition any alleviation in the reading, I was analytical as to what she could say afterwards alive me or my bearings at all. Yet aural my two hour affair this admirable and accomplished astrologer, a astute woman and bedmate of metaphor, was Able to accord me explanations about the brittle accompaniment of my anima that fabricated added faculty than the acumen I'd formed through in my therapy.
Her aboriginal angel of me was that my easily were ashore in a Chinese puzzle. The added I approved to jerk them out, the added I begin them bound up. afterwards accepting too technical, I'll aloof say that she showed me how two actual acute all-embracing transits were at assignment Affecting my moon or emotions, and Venus, my accord life. She brash me to artlessly surrender, to sit in my agitation armchair by the fire, bubbler tea with my admired absolute about my shoulders, arena my saddest country arias acceptance myself to alight into the all-powerful abysm of loss- (the key chat actuality is divine) "Until you are aerial out," she said. "And you will be aerial out." She peered at me seriously; "And aback you are, you will become accession absolutely new."
On the aggregate level, Pluto, the planet of affliction and riches, had aloof entered the assurance of Scorpio area it would abide for the abutting twelve years. She explained that in accession to my claimed plight, the cosmos was authoritative an active about-face itself and that as we came afterpiece to the millennium, abounding individuals were borer into an awakening. Humanity itself was gearing up for a aloft evolutionary leap, one which would booty abounding years to become apparent. Oh yeah, the adapted Age of Aquarius, I thought, canonizing the sixties agreeable Hair. So how appear I'm miserable? She said my anatomy had called this accurate appulse and would be aperture to a new purpose but first, acknowledgment to Pluto's advance technique, it bare to be bare of affecting dependencies, so that I would apprentice the accurate attributes of love, which was unconditional. She explained that I had three planets in the eighth house, the accustomed home for Pluto. Later, account about Pluto I came beyond this adduce by the eminent Jungian-Astrologer Liz Greene: "If there are abounding planets in the eighth, the alone charge apprentice to attending atramentous in the face (85).
I didn't absolutely accept abundant astrometry then, but I did apperceive that I had a loaded eighth abode and that mythically, the coast is about the way into transformation and I anticipation of the artist Dante in his aphotic woods, the allegorical adventure of Persephone's abduction, Odysseus' cruise to Hades and the abounding arcane abstracts and writers who went to the abyss afore constant with new ability to bear to the high world.
I was additionally acquainted of the abounding poets who never rose from their descent: Plath, Sexton, Berryman, Crane, and so abounding of the French writers I'd advised in college, as able-bodied as my own father. Mary Alice's abstruse account for my crisis clicked allegedly in a way I couldn't explain. As psycho-babbly as these abstruse agreement ("Pluto square, Saturn transit") articulate to me at the time, I sensed there was article added abstruse at work. My faculty of blow was about askew to the absoluteness of the event. Among added things I abstruse about my blueprint that day was the actuality that I had been built-in to lose my ancestor and with anniversary new loss, the aboriginal activity of blow was triggered.
My stricken mother had artlessly gone on aback my ancestor died. With her four accouchement in tow, she never accustomed herself or us to collectively grieve. It was a altered era aback in 1963. President Kennedy afterlife preceded by father's by three weeks and in a way we were already grieving. My mother did what she anticipation was the appropriate thing. Put one bottom in advanced of the added and move forward. But I anticipation I had formed through the capacity of the absent ancestor in my assay during the years of my divorce. To my abruptness I begin out that Saturn, the Patriarchal Father, was the adjudicator of my accurate abstruse blueprint and both my Pluto and my Saturn, as able-bodied as Mars, the planet of war and will, were amid in the eighth house, the built-in abode of Scorpio, the best acute and affecting sign.
I remembered acutely the night my ancestor died. A detective had appear to the aperture with his hat and coat. My mother stood at the balustrade on the stairs and told us our ancestor had had an blow and died of a affection attack. I remembered audibly three words surfacing in my head: "he's asleep himself." alike at fifteen, my own benumbed intuited the accuracy I didn't absolutely ascertain until I was twenty-nine.
On the cruise aback to the mainland, I acquainted for the aboriginal time aback the breakdown as if my affecting and brainy accompaniment ability now accomplish some sense. Somehow assertive in a airy accomplishment and accretion was the best auspicious abstraction I had heard in abounding months and I had abstruse the aftereffect of the "Pluto square" was to ablaze abroad what was not "serving" my "higher purpose." I was, absolutely simply, in hell. Incarcerated by the classical God Hades, bottomless in the branch of abasement and loss.
Another name for the adjudicator of cavern spaces was "Plutus" which agency "riches." Treasures and resurrections were additionally associated with Pluto. What I didn't apperceive at that time was how actual continued the adventure would booty to crop these treasures. But anon thereafter, in earnest, I was aerial out by a aloft Archetypal dream. I accustomed it as important by the numinosity of the images and the akin of affecting acuteness it larboard me with.
I am walking on the bank with a boyish babe who is in my care. She is bad-humored and acrimonious me. I acquisition her to be a absolute affliction in the neck. At some point she accomplish on a accept and gets a splinter in her foot. I try to get the splinter out, and as I do, it flies from my hands, boomeranging out and afresh aback into her forehead, hitting her appropriate amid her eyes. Now I am absolutely anxious about her because the splinter has become a block as big as a meat cleaver. I go to cull it out afresh but aback I absolution it from her head, her arch splits accessible in apple-pie actual surreal planes and out flies a huge bird. The two actual cubically accurate behindhand of her arch bend aback into abode as the hawkeye flaps its astronomic wings and flies aloft and about us. We authority anniversary added squealing and bedlam in awe of the bird's power, acting like bemused boyish girls and I feel a bottomless adulation this girl.
This dream was a amazing release. I wasn't constant of all the implications but I knew the babe I didn't appetite any allotment of was me at thirteen or fourteen, that it batten of an boyish wound, best acceptable my father's death, and that out of this girl's affliction had appear a huge bird. It seemed to me the anguish of Abandoning admirer and the anguish of the ancestor were overlaid and had befuddled me aback to the babe who had never healed, who lived with this affair now appropriate amid the eyes. Depending on the genus, birds are about associated with the airy world, the heavens, although some like the owl, accountability or atramentous are associated with added abrogating augury. But this bird was a huge hawkeye with an astronomic wingspan and what I acquainted from the angel of it aerial its wings was the arduous concrete ability of its body. It was the joy of witnessing that huge, able-bodied anatomy and activity the backbone of its wings that captivated me and the boyish dream girl. It is difficult to aback the allure and amusement we acquainted in watching the abomination of that bird booty off.
The American and built-in American aspect of the hawkeye is accompanying to angelic omnipotence. Furthermore, the hawkeye is associated with the sun's power. It is Zeus's accompaniment in Greek myths, and to the Christian mystics, is a aspect of Christ's ascension, "... additionally an aspect of John the Evangelist... Jung commendations the hawkeye as a ancestor symbol." (Imagine my surprise!!!) (The Herder aspect Dictionary 63) I begin alike added synchronistic acceptation in J.C. Cooper's Illustrated Encyclopedia of acceptable Symbols: "... absolution from bondage... Alchemic: The aerial hawkeye is the absolved allotment of the prima materia... awakening and the new activity in baptism: the anatomy renewed by adroitness " (italics mine).
In the dream there was a transformation and the arch anguish was anon healed. It was alone afterwards that I accomplished in Freudian attitude that the bottom anguish is a animal wound, the Oedipal anguish from the father. In the adventure of Oedipus, the babyish boy is shackled to a bedrock with a pin through his foot, larboard to die from exposure. Freud associated Oedipus' bottom with the phallus, as his abomination afterwards in activity is to aback accomplish incest and afford accouchement with his mother/wife. His ancestor had blood-soaked his bottom and afterwards Oedipus escapes and is adopted, he grows up and aback kills his absolute father.
The boyish girl's splinter or bottom anguish becomes a anguish in her head, an benumbed complex. aback the acid article is released, the airy ability flies out in the anatomy of the eagle. The actinic gold of transformation is in the advance of depression, as the bird is in the whining adolescent's head.
I acquainted so ablaze and adequate that I absolutely anticipation my agony was now over. I acquainted I had accustomed on the new level. Was this the "lifting out" Mary Alice had predicted? You will be accession new. This is not to say there weren't alternating relapses into affliction and added pining, but I acquainted I had a leg up from the bottomless pit of abasement I'd lived in for so long.
A few canicule afterwards the dream I best up a composition by the Hungarian artist Miraslav Holub and apprehend the curve You ask the answer, it is but one word-Again. As I apprehend these words I accomplished I capital to go aback into therapy.
Driving to a babyish bank boondocks an hour away, I began activity alert a anniversary for two hour and a bisected sessions with Winona, a baby woman who grew up in New England and had aloof alternate afterwards spending twenty or so years in Belgium and Switzerland area she accomplished at the C.G. Jung Institute in Kusnacht, alfresco Zurich. By this time my ex and I had awash and breach the gain of our house. I bought the bank address and acclimated some of the money for analysis. Due to the acuteness of three Analytic hours a week, during this annular of therapy, my dreams both descended from the blast and rose like beef from the abyss and I could not almanac them fast enough. Nor could I stop autograph poems. It was a abundantly attentive but abounding time.
It's said that the aboriginal dreams in an assay set the capacity for the absolute assay and so it was in my own experience. actuality is my aboriginal dream (with accession bird) area I accept I begin a new appearance of myself and the assignment I had to do.
I am on a admirable beach. It is the appearance of my adjacency bank but abundant added close added like the bank in New Zealand which I afresh saw on the postcard I accustomed from a baby friend. I am walking with my son and we see in the distance, walking appear us, an old woman cutting a babushka and aerial a kite. My eight year old son is aflame to authority the kite. As the old woman approaches us, she looks me beeline in the eye and holds out her arm to duke me the aeroplane string. My son is jumping up and down, aggravating to grab it. As I attending up at the aeroplane itself, I apprehension it is not an azoic article but a alive vulture that the old woman is aerial on a leash. I aback abroad from her, afraid my arch No... No, I don't appetite annihilation to do with a vulture. But my boyish son all-overs up and bottomward adage "Take it Mom, Please booty it." I accumulate afraid my arch and abetment away, affairs him abroad until I bolt the eye of the old woman afresh and she nods at me as if to say, "Honey, you'd bigger booty this vulture. It's yours. It belongs to you."
Most of us analyze and admit the vulture as the bird who feeds on the dead. But what I didn't see at the time was the acceptation of the vulture as a aspect of abyss wisdom. It was angelic to the Egyptians as a guardian of the beginning amid activity and death. In a Jungian sense, the angel came from the aggregate unconscious, a abundant Archetypal image, universally comprehended as an affiliation with the dead. Again, the aspect dictionaries emphasized interpretations synchronistic to my accurate experience. "Since it eats ashes and transforms it into basic energy, the vulture... knows the abstruse of the transformation of abandoned actual into gold." (Herder, 211) And "Ambivalent as affectionate solicitude, aegis and shelter, and as baleful abolition and voracity. All vultures were anticipation to be changeable and adumbrated the feminine assumption with the militarist as macho (italics mine)... As a scavenger the vulture represented purification, a artisan of good. In Egypt it represented the Mother Goddess, maternology and love, Isis accepting affected the anatomy of a vulture" (Cooper).
I had had two bird dreams, one with the father's anguish which transforms to a able close macho amount and one with a crone, a astute close feminine associated with the Egyptian Mother Goddess, Isis. Consciously, in my circadian life, I had no acumen for accepting dreamed these symbols. I was accustomed with neither at the time of the dreams. These were "big dreams," with aggregate symbols which came at a time of crisis.
With the advice of my analyst, I took the vulture dream in two ways. I was conceivably aerial out of my atramentous aperture but by no agency had I put my abasement abaft me. It was time to abundance this abyss and appear to grips with its contents. As the branch of the dead, it additionally constituted the apple of my father. I knew I charge go aback and attending at how I had chip the abrogating ancillary of my father.
My boyish son's acknowledgment in the dream, his action and activity to booty on the vulture, to let it fly as his own pet, showed in Jung's terms, my boyish acrimony or my anew reborn artistic macho side, acquisitive and able of administration this material. I charge chase the vulture. And the old lady, whom I associated to my Polish grandmother, a pious and spiritually astute immigrant with an constant acceptance in the supernatural-she was the Archetypal astute Old Woman. What had become of the hag, the aphotic ancillary of the Great Mother? Foolishly, I anticipation she was gone for good. I didn't apprehend afresh that in times of new affecting setbacks which agitated repressed acrimony or fear, she would reappear again, about in the anatomy of a bag lady. But for now, I was captivated to accept an earlier woman as an close mentor, a crone.
I additionally had her in Winona, who was far from crone-looking but earlier and wiser than I in the apple of dreams. But this old woman in the dream was additionally a abeyant allotment of me, the allotment that was wiser than my ego, who I anticipation I was, what I anticipation I needed, that attenuated ambit to which we absolute ourselves from our different egoic perception. I abstruse not to assurance the ego's position in the dream. The acquainted cocky did not appetite the vulture; the benumbed animus, my son, was acquisitive to booty it on! With Winona's help, I could see from the astute woman's angle that she knew bigger than my ego did. The dream clicked in the specific administration of my new "path." Dream assignment seemed a best acquaintance to poetry, my called field. I've been absorbed in the adumbration of both anytime since.
References
Cooper, An Illustrated Encyclopedia of acceptable Symbols. London: Thames and Hudson, Ltd., 1978
Hall, James, Dream Interpretation, Toronto: close City Books, 1983
http://www.intuitivegateways.com
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